


in another universe

by maureenbrown



Category: Six of Crows Series - Leigh Bardugo
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Crooked Kingdom Spoilers, M/M, Post-Crooked Kingdom
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-05
Updated: 2017-03-05
Packaged: 2018-09-28 08:56:47
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 853
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10082444
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/maureenbrown/pseuds/maureenbrown
Summary: “You’re back.” Jesper exhales, letting the confusion and the relief sink through with his tone. He can’t quite reach his breath yet, feeling the tightness in his chest and the usual ebb and flow in the back of his throat, his usual nonchalance fleeting.“Only because I allowed you to find me.” Kaz says evenly, raising his eyebrows.





	

**Author's Note:**

> im destroyed. find me on tumblr and hmu @jesprefahey

“You’re back.” Jesper exhales, letting the confusion and the relief sink through with his tone. He can’t quite reach his breath yet, feeling the tightness in his chest and the usual ebb and flow in the back of his throat, his usual nonchalance fleeting.

“Only because I allowed you to find me.” Kaz says evenly, raising his eyebrows. He looks the same, his skin pale, his eyebrows not as evenly manicured as Jesper’s are, though just the right amount of thin mixed with bushy. His jaw and neck are as curved as the crows head cane, which he leans on with a heavier amount of weight than he used to.

“Why?” Jesper blurts before he can stop himself, swallowing dryly. He watches Kaz’s expression stay put, not even phased to his bluntness. If there’s anything Jesper has learned over the years, is that nothing could surprise him. If life were chess, he would be the ever reigning opponent, having guessed your next thousand moves before you even sat down. 

“I’m only checking in.” Kaz responds vaguely.

Jesper almost feels affronted, his usual lopsided smirk on his lips, though it’s crueler now. “What, so you can just up and leave again?” He answers, knowing very well the flick of Kaz’s eyes means he’s examining him. He’s made himself vulnerable, an ant underneath a magnifying glass below a scorching sun, scrambling to keep from getting burned. 

“Listen, Brekker, I know you didn’t come here for sentimental sake. What do you want? More business? More reasons for me to put my life out on the line?” Jesper demands, forcing himself to keep his voice even. 

“So… What you’re implying is a question as to why I left and what I’ve been doing.” Kaz states, not even waving a lazy hand to bat away his confrontation.

Jesper’s heart shouldn’t thud this much, his head shouldn’t swim. “Brekker.” He starts, this time his throat constricting before he can so much as explode. 

He feels himself getting to his feet, a slight scuffle in which his knees bang the top of the table and—

There’s a hand on his wrist. Wrapped in leather, due to Kaz’s signature gloves, but it’s a touch nonetheless. 

Jesper feels as if every time he’s drawn his revolvers, the target has been exactly to his heart. His senses are piercing, his pulse thrumming underneath his gloved fingertips. 

“Jesper, sit down.” Kaz orders, but it’s not as firm as usual. Jesper can’t tell if his tone is almost pleading or if he imagined it. Wanted it, even. His hand is gone, he realizes that now, but he still feels the applied pressure, his stomach lurching and exploding at the thought.

The sharpshooter sinks back down, slouching inside the tavern, not able to meet his eyes. “What’s this all about, Kaz? It’s not like you missed us.” He lets the ‘missed me’ hang in the air.

“I’m leaving again. I thought I should tell one of you.” Kaz replies, and it sounds rehearsed.

“Oh, ‘one of us?’ What happened to when you were ‘one of us?’ Listen, Brekker, you should have contacted Inej. She’s a lot more patient with your bullshit than I am right around now.” Jesper says, and Kaz appears almost bored by his sudden outburst.

“I wanted to tell you goodbye.” Kaz mutters, his eyebrows scrunching once as if he’s faintly frustrated by Jesper’s lack of obedience towards hearing him out.

“Me?” Jesper asks, and Kaz gives a jut of his chin. 

Jesper opens his mouth before biting down on his tongue sharply. Kaz always has a game to play, and Jesper voicing his self-deprecating concerns would only cause him to regret his decision or immerse himself in the lifelong knowledge that he’s only and always will be a pawn in Kaz “Dirtyhands” Brekker’s palm.

But, then again… When was he ever not?

“I missed you.” Jesper allows himself to say. 

Kaz’s shoulders sag barely, and his lips curve upwards into an almost delicate smile. It’s reserved and brief. In another world, maybe Jesper would’ve asked him for permission to lean across the table of the dingy bar and run his fingertips over his chin, then his jaw and his lips. 

In another, he may have just leaned across and waited for Kaz’s permission before finally sinking their lips together, his heart singing in the most adolescent of giddiness.

Instead, in this world of his own, where Jesper would lay his life down for his companions in a matter of milliseconds, done anything for redemption or the barest of smiles, he grins back. He flashes him pearl-white teeth and chats with him about Nina’s grieving and recovery, Inej’s time with her parents, how things are going with his never-ending trials with Kuwei Yul-Bo and Wylan. He cracks jokes per usual, flirts shamelessly, runs his fingertips over his own thighs and clenches his hands on top of his holsters when Kaz Brekker finally lets out a harsh bark of a laugh.

In this universe, that is more than enough.

Even when Kaz leaves, the inside of his wrist is still yearning for his touch.


End file.
